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Sally's Journal
May 8th, 2004
08:46 pm


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Sigh. Essay still not existant. Have done loads and loads of reading today, and think I have my head round some of the more exotic ideas, but the actual useful information seems to be a little scattered to the four winds. In the later papers, they can talk about what things are confidently, but don't ever try and do the maths, referring you back to the really old papers, where yes, they were actually doing the maths, but didn't have a clue what they were doing. Thank heavens for Mike Procters lecture notes, which seem to be the only sensible thing out there that explains how to do stuff while at the same time knowing what stuff it's trying to do. Still going to be a lot of effort pulling it together into something coherant before the deadline though.

M. has been trully lovely, taking all the stress of living off my hands by sorting out the dishwasher, cooking me food, and just generally hugging me and keeping me happy. He seems to have the balence of knowing when I just can't work and need to be left alone to miserably spod, and knowing when I'm pointlessly wasting time and need pointing in the right direction again. Now he's out at a party, and I am alone with my papers. I think I'll try and read through the current one and then curl up in bed with Mannervilles book on convection. Fun, fun, fun.

I don't deserve him. These last few days have been like falling in love with him all over again. I just want to touch him, be hugged by him, sit round chatting with him... and I close my eyes and I see him grinning, or sleeping (looking angelic, and about 5), or doing the nostrils-and-eyebrows thing. Re-reading all the old emails from before we were going out was funny. Ah, Clare and Coenna... He's just so caring. I really don't deserve him. And I have to snap out of my self destructive habit of testing people to breaking poing to see if they really love me. If only it were after the exams.

(5 comments | Leave a comment)

[User Picture]
Date:May 8th, 2004 02:29 pm (UTC)
Aw, that's so cute. And I'm sure he disagrees with the whole not-deserving thing. You two are so cool!
[User Picture]
Date:May 8th, 2004 04:09 pm (UTC)
Ooh, Mike Proctor at Trinity? Kinda friend of my family, so what's he like as a teacher, and as a mathematician? I find it weird to think of the academics I know personally as actually going out there and doing academic things, for some reason - same with my law prof. uncle. I can just about fathom both aspects of my PhD-doing friends, perhaps because they're much closer to me in age, but I wonder if they'll start becoming aliens once they get on to the post-doc-ing?
[User Picture]
Date:May 9th, 2004 01:21 am (UTC)
Well, part III is a mishmash of courses that change ever year, and Dr Procters course was done last year and not this one. So I can tell you he writes good lectures notes ;-)

He lectured me for DDE's though, and was good, despite fighting the problem of being in a 12 - 1 slot (I get hungry far far too early for camrbidge lecture times!)

And he does really shiney interesting mathematics.
[User Picture]
Date:May 8th, 2004 07:32 pm (UTC)
I envy you. Really. Make sure that neither of you grows bored or comes to accept the other as granted.
[User Picture]
Date:May 9th, 2004 03:02 am (UTC)
I don't deserve him.

Don't be silly :)

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