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Bother. I was very organised back in March, and bought a wedding… - Sally's Journal
May 6th, 2008
12:01 pm

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Bother. I was very organised back in March, and bought a wedding anniversary card. However, I was overwhelmed by a fit of paranoia while in Tesco's last night that I had lost it, and so bought another one. Predictably, this means I have two.

This is, of course, infinitely better than having none. But it still leaves me with a question:

What should I do?

Give him one card
2(2.2%)
Give him two cards
9(9.9%)
Start a tradition of giving him N cards on the Nth wedding-anniversary
8(8.8%)
Anything, sweet God, anything, but the previous option!
10(11.0%)
Put the spare card in a safe place where you won't lose it and he won't see it for a year...
7(7.7%)
...and I know such a place which I will explain in comments [pointlessly, as M can read this post]
1(1.1%)


(assume that at least one of the cards doesn't say "second wedding anniversary", or anything else that would scupper its re-use)

(23 comments | Leave a comment)

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From:meglorien
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:06 am (UTC)
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Next year you will want a different card anyway, and I'm sure M won't think it's too many.
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From:simont
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:08 am (UTC)
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Put the spare card in a safe place where you won't lose it and he won't see it for a year

My brain has just suggested "sellotaped to the back of his head". Possibly it's had too much coffee :-)
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From:emperor
Date:May 6th, 2008 01:08 pm (UTC)
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I would like to strongly deprecate this suggestion :-)
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From:ghoti
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:13 am (UTC)
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Colin and I have places where we put presents, and the other is *not* allowed to look. Could you and M be that restrained?
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From:woodpijn
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:53 am (UTC)
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Same here. Alex deliberately buys me cards more than a year in advance, and I know where they are and I know not to look.
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From:cartesiandaemon
Date:May 6th, 2008 12:05 pm (UTC)
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Deliberately? That's really quite insanely organised. Is there a particular reason for planning far in advance, or just to get several cards while you happen to remember?
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From:woodpijn
Date:May 6th, 2008 12:29 pm (UTC)
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I don't think Alex has ever been called insanely organised before :P

I think it's just that if he sees a card he thinks would be good for a given person, he buys it, even if the occasion is several months away, and/or if he already has a card and will have to save one of them for the following year.

I am slowly coming round to this point of view myself: that it's better to buy the ideal card for someone a year early than to go card-shopping the week before and just buy the best of what's available that week. And I once saw a 50th birthday card that would be great for my dad, but didn't buy it because he was only 48 at the time and it would have been silly; then when he turned 50 I couldn't find it again, wished I'd bought it, and had to make do with a less good one.
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From:cartesiandaemon
Date:May 6th, 2008 02:31 pm (UTC)
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LOL. But yes, I agree, I don't naturally tend to do anything like that, but it totally makes sense, and I really do think it is laudably organised. It's even easier if you do it a lot, as you don't have to wonder where the card might be put, but have a good place for it. And you can pick up any generic cards you like, and fish one out when you have an occasion too.
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From:kerrypolka
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:14 am (UTC)
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I think one of them should be a secret card that may or may not be the setup for some sort of pervasive game.

I have no idea how this would work, or how you would manage to design it before tonight, but that would be awesome. Maybe MARRIAGE IS ITS OWN PERVASIVE GAME!
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From:samholloway
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:39 am (UTC)
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You could always take it back; Tesco will be happy to refund it. Unless you've written in it already. :-)
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From:oedipamaas49
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:39 am (UTC)
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[x] write about it in an unlocked post, and let M share your angst...
[x] send one of them to a friend on their wedding anniversary (if it's a card that can be sent to a non-spouse)

But kerrypolka's suggestion is clearly the best
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From:neoanjou
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:50 am (UTC)
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Assuming you're not a particularly modern hot-desking environment, and aren't planning on moving jobs in the next 12 months or so, is there anything wrong with the office desk drawer?
From:ext_72852
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:53 am (UTC)
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decide on a securely hidden place, such as deep in the loft rafters, wrapped in cling film.

write a cron job on some machine you have access to which will email you a week in advance of next year's anniversary, reminding you about this card and its location.

(for bonus points, encrypt the whole thing).
From:Dave Holland [org.uk]
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:56 am (UTC)
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Serves you right for being too organised ;-)
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From:pm215
Date:May 6th, 2008 11:58 am (UTC)
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Give him one card on the first anniversary, two on the second, four on the next, eight on the next, and so on...
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From:emperor
Date:May 6th, 2008 01:10 pm (UTC)
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If atreic starts doing this, I shall post the excess every year to you with the cheapest stamp I can find attached :p
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From:cartesiandaemon
Date:May 6th, 2008 02:03 pm (UTC)
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After sixty years, that's only a dozen Deimoses (international postal stand weight metric).
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From:cartesiandaemon
Date:May 6th, 2008 12:09 pm (UTC)
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* Wow, congratulations to both!
* I don't think it matters that much any option would be nice
* You could leave it with a friend. Or give it to him in an envelope marked "do not open until [receive sign]". But now I hear them, "at work" sounds fine. And would also have the advantage that every day you can run across it and feel fluffy happy! :)
* Find a complicated function which is normally 1 but f(2) is 2.
* Find a complicated function where f(1) is 1 and f(2) is 2 but is often zero, and then you won't have to bother.
* Do whatever M suggestes
* Pretend to have an extra card, and make a public LJ post, to show M how much effort you've devoted to him :)
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From:sphyg
Date:May 6th, 2008 08:03 pm (UTC)
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I've already bought one for September ;)
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From:ashfae
Date:May 7th, 2008 05:43 pm (UTC)
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Let Herring give him the duplicate one!
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From:atreic
Date:May 7th, 2008 09:18 pm (UTC)
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You are the cleverest! Why did no-one else suggest this?

Ah yes, because Herring isn't actually married to my husband... ;-)
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From:ashfae
Date:May 8th, 2008 01:09 pm (UTC)
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Minor technicality!
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